One Way or Another
by Donny's Boy
Summary: RugratsAGU gang in their college years. Who knew that one frat party could change so many lives and relationships? Romance focusing on ChuckAngie, but also including TomLil, SusiePhil, and KimDil.
1. Bad Ideas

"One Way or Another"

By Donny's Boy

Disclaimer: I own neither the characters nor the plot of _Rugrats _and/or_ All Grown Up_, nor the lyrics or music of Blondie's "One Way or Another," and I am making no money from this story. I mean no harm.

Warnings: Some mature language, alcohol use, cigarette use, possibly discussion/references to sexual situations.

**Chapter 1: Bad Ideas**

"This is a bad idea."

If Thomas Pickles had a dollar for every time he'd heard that, he'd be a very rich man by now. And he was only eighteen. Tom groaned. "Chuck," he said patiently, "you always say that."

Charles Finster sat back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. "I always say it because it's always a bad idea."

"Wait, wait, wait," Philip DeVille interrupted, shaking his head. He looked back and forth between his two friends with a serious expression. Then he motioned for them both to continue. "Sorry," he explained, grinning. "I was just having a flashback to when we were six."

Tom shot Phil a withering look, but Phil only grinned wider.

Chuck glanced around the dining hall. It was mid-afternoon, so there weren't as many students as usual. He glanced down at his tray, where a bruised wormy apple sat in all its unappealing glory. He really hated college food. But maybe if he kept staring at the table, they'd forget he was there. They'd forget what they'd been talking about.

"So, Chuck … "

Maybe not.

Chuck sighed. It was the deep sigh of the eternally tormented. "Bad idea," he repeated.

Tom pouted a little, while Phil rolled his eyes. "C'mon, man," Phil wheedled, "this is an unparalleled opportunity. I don't think you understand. Let me set the scene." He pointed at Chuck. "You: Wise, experienced older guy. Guy whose freshman year roommate is now a brother in the biggest party frat on campus."

"Don't remind me," Chuck interjected sourly.

Phil ignored him. Once he had some momentum going, nothing could bring him down. "Us," he continued, gesturing to himself and Tom. "Young, inexperienced freshman. No social networking in place, no chance in hell of getting onto a frat party's guest list."

"Which we very much want to do," interjected Tom.

"Which we very much want to do." Phil smiled, triumphant. "It's just a small favor, Chuck. Just ask your old roomie—what's his face, Mark?—if he'll put us on the list."

Chuck glared, bright green eyes flashing behind black-rimmed glasses. He pushed away his lunch tray. "All right," he said grudgingly, "but let me point out the problems in this perfect plan. Me? I never got along with my roomie—his name is Matt—and have no desire to reestablish contact. I moved to an off-campus apartment for a _reason_, guys. Meanwhile, Matt? Has no reason to do me any favors. He never liked me much either. And you two? Are too young to drink anyways. So there."

"Thanks, Mom," Phil said and grabbed the apple off Chuck's tray. Chuck frowned in disgust as Phil took a bite.

Meanwhile, Tom smiled what he hoped was an encouraging smile. "But Lillian will be there to keep us out of trouble. She's a girl, which must make her at least twenty-three or twenty-four in guy years."

Chuck snorted.

"And as for Matt … well, we'll give him a reason to do us a favor. A little tit-for-tat."

"Oh?" Chuck's eyes narrowed to little slits. He didn't like where this was going. He didn't like it at all. "What reason could you possibly have, Tom?"

Tom's clear blue eyes sparkled, like they always did when he felt he was going to win. "You forget," he said calmly, almost casually, "who I'm related to."

Chuck frowned in confusion. Dil was still just a high school senior. What could _he_ do? It just didn't make any—oh. Oh, no. Chuck's eyes went wide in sudden panic. Tom meant _her_.


	2. Left Behind

**Chapter 2: Left Behind**

With a small sigh, Kimi Finster handed a mocha to a customer then glanced up at the wall clock. Three-fifteen. Exactly three minutes later than it had been the last time she'd looked at the clock. Any minute now …

And right on cue Dylan Pickles came through the door of the Java Lava, just like every weekday, waving to her as he wandered up to the counter. "Heya, Kim," he greeted.

"Hi, Dil. What'll it be today?"

He squinted at the menu posted over the counter, pretending to think.

Kim pretended to be annoyed. "Pickles, hurry it up. You're holding up the line here."

Dil glanced over his shoulder. Not a soul was in sight. "Alrighty then." He slapped the counter and gave her a wide, goofy grin. "Gimme the usual."

She grinned back. Then she turned, grabbed a coffee cup, and fixed the monstrosity of sugar and caffeine that Dil always ordered. Turning back, she saw that he was still grinning at her. Her hands started sweating.

"So," he said, pulling out his wallet, "you started missing him yet?"

Kim cocked her head, confused. "Who?"

Dil rolled his eyes. Oh, his eyes. Blue, like Tom's, but a few shades darker, fringed with light red lashes. "Who?" he repeated, shaking his head and handing her his money. "The Chuckster! Y'know, your brother? I mean, he was around all summer, and now he's back at college. You don't miss him?"

"Oh!" Kim took the bills and felt like a complete idiot. "Sure, I miss Chuck a little. I dunno. Maybe this will sound bad, but it's a little less weird than it was this time last year, when he first left. Y'know?"

He nodded and took the drink she handed to him.

Realization hit her. She gave him a sympathetic smile and patted his arm—purely to comfort him, of course. "You're missing Tom, huh?"

Dil looked away, embarrassed. "Yeah," he admitted. "It's just … it's like you said. It's a little weird, not having him around all the time. And he doesn't really call home that much. He's busy, I guess."

"It gets better. I promise. He'll calm down, settle in, or whatever it is college freshmen do. Then he'll start calling more often."

He looked up hopefully. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Hmm." He took a sip from his drink. "Hey, Kim?"

She couldn't help noticing that, from him, her name sounded beautiful. She hated herself for noticing.

"Yeah, Dil?"

"I'm glad you decided to stay here and go to community college." He grinned again. "It'd sure be lonely if _everyone_ had left."

"I do what I can, Pickles, I do what I can." Kim looked away and hoped like hell she wasn't blushing. Softly she added, "I'm glad you're still here too."


	3. Favors

**Chapter 3: Favors**

The sorority house was oddly quiet. Usually there was something … girls talking in the kitchen, watching television in the living room, playing music in their bedrooms. But a lull had fallen over the house, one of the rare purely-by-happenstance moments when almost everyone was out.

Angelica Pickles liked the quiet. She loved her sorority sisters. She'd never had siblings growing up. Had always told herself she hadn't wanted to until college, where she'd found that she actually liked having other girls around, to talk to and watch movies with and to trade clothes with. But, love them though she may, sometimes a house full of girls could get to be a bit much.

She padded downstairs, smiling. It was so quiet Angelica could hear the birds outside. She threw herself onto the couch and lazily pondered what she would do with her weekend. Shopping would almost definitely have to be involved, she decided.

Her reverie was rudely interrupted by the doorbell. "Doorbell!" she yelled. No one responded, so she tried again. "Someone get the damn door!"

Still nada.

Perfect. Just perfect.

Good mood dissipating rapidly, Angelica pulled herself up and stomped over to the door. She threw it open and paused. Then she sighed. "Oh, dear God."

"And a good afternoon to you too, Angie."

It was Phil who greeted her, but she stared at Tom instead. "What do you want, Tommy?"

Tom shook his head as though he were hurt. "Angelica, you wound me," he said. "Is it so wrong for me to want to visit my favorite cousin?"

"I'm your only cousin," she pointed out, giving each boy an appraising stare. Phil looked a little confused, Tom looked eager, and Chuck looked incredibly nervous. In other words, everything seemed normal enough.

Tom grinned, the grin that had won more than one girl's heart. Angelica had always hated that grin. But it meant that he was going to be pestering her for a bit longer, so she stepped to the side and ushered her visitors in. "Couch," she said and pointed. "Sit."

The three boys sat obediently.

Angelica sighed again and sat in a nearby chair. "So," she began, "to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

"We have a favor to ask," said Tom.

"This is a bad idea," Chuck muttered, while Phil rolled his eyes.

"And why," Angelica began carefully, addressing Tom, "should I want to do a favor for you?" She glanced at Chuck and Phil. "Or any of you, for that matter."

"Because I'm your cousin and you love me?"

"Try again."

Tom leaned forward, eyes bright. "Because if you don't, I'll reveal some very personal information that I happen to have." He titled his head and looked, for all the world, like a little bird. "Information that I don't think you want to become public knowledge."

"I'm afraid I don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about." She knew exactly what he was talking about but wanted to see if he was bluffing.

"I could tell everyone right now, if you'd—"

Angelica jumped up. "That won't be necessary!" Phil and Chuck flinched. She took a deep breath to compose herself then mustered up her best glower, which Tom steadfastly ignored. She gave up. "So go ahead and tell me, I don't have all day. What's your favor?"

----

Author's Notes: Glad you're enjoying the story so far! I think Phil/Kim makes a lot of sense, but for some reason—not entirely sure why—I've always wanted to put Kim and Dil together. I guess I just think they'd be cute.


	4. The Smokers' Code

**Chapter 4: The Smokers' Code**

Lifting her designer sunglasses, Susan Carmichael shook her head in disbelief. "That is cold," she said, in a tone of disgust mixed with awe.

"I know!" Angelica leaned against the large Grecian columns of the English department building, remembering. "I think I must be rubbing off on the little twerp."

Susie checked her watch then picked up the backpack at her feet. When Angelica remained motionless, she raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you coming into class?"

"Yeah. In a minute." Angelica unzipped her purse and took out a pack of cigarettes. She held them up. "Smoke break first."

Susie had given many lectures in the past, all to no avail, regarding her roommate/sorority sister's smoking. But since Angelica always kept it outdoors, Susie couldn't really complain. So instead Susie simply shrugged, slung her backpack over her shoulders, and started up the stairs. She paused when she reached the top, however. "Hey, Angie?"

Angelica glanced up at her. "Yeah?"

"You know the best way to deal with a secret is to tell it, right?"

"Good-bye, Carmichael."

Returning her attentions to her task, Angelica tried to light her cigarette but failed. She tried again. And failed. She shook the lighter and scowled at it. Must be out of fluid. Stupid piece of—

"Here."

Angelica glanced up and found herself looking into the earnest green eyes of Chuck Finster. He held out a lighter, flame glowing, in his hand. She leaned forward with the cigarette in her mouth and allowed him to light it. After taking a few puffs, she turned to see he still stood there. "Any particular reason you carry a lighter?" she asked.

"Well, I smoke too."

She practically choked. "No. No, you _don't_. No way."

"It helps calm my nerves." He shrugged. "Left my pack in my other pants, though."

"Huh." She still wasn't sure she believed him but handed him her pack anyways. "Here. Have one."

He looked down at the cigarettes, unsure.

"It's the smokers' code, Finster. Have 'em, share 'em." She sighed. "Hurry up and take one before I change my mind, will ya?"

He did, lighting it effortlessly. As he took a deep drag, Angelica realized that maybe he'd been telling the truth about being a smoker himself. Well, smoking did help calm the nerves—and if anyone's nerves needed calming, that person was Chuck. It made sense, almost.

"Thanks," he said, returning her pack.

She nodded towards his lighter. "Thanks yourself."

They stood smoking for a few moments in silence. He rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. She could practically taste his edginess, he was so wound up. She wondered when he would finally crack. He'd never been good at keeping things from her.

"So, Angie."

Not long, then. But that was hardly a surprise. "Yeah?"

"I just, uh, wanted to say I'm sorry. For the other day."

The other day? Angelica's brows knit together in thought. Then she remembered. "Oh! The favor." She waved her hand dismissively. "It's okay, I actually know Matt. Well, I've seen him around, anyways. He's not bad-looking. Not up to my usual standards, of course, but really, who is?"

"Even so. I didn't know Tom was going to pull that. Neither did Phil." Chuck looked away and muttered, "It was a shitty thing to do."

Chuck, saying something against Tom? Well, how interesting. Angelica made a note to file away this tidbit of information for future reference.

"Apology accepted," she told him, putting out her cigarette and grabbing her books. "Now outta my way. You're going to make me late for class."

As she headed up the stairs, she smiled with satisfaction to see him fairly stumble over his own feet in a rush to get out of her path. Some things never changed—and when it came to Charles Finster, she liked that.

---

Author's Notes: Finally we get some one-on-one Chuck/Angie … and there's more to come.


	5. Two Sides to Every Coin

**Chapter 5: Two Sides to Every Coin**

While her twin brother laughed, Lillian DeVille frowned in disapproval. It wasn't funny. It wasn't funny at all.

"You should've seen her face," he gasped through his tears. "It was priceless, Lillian."

"It was blackmail, Philip," Lil complained.

"Well, yeah." Over on the other bed, which belonged to Lil's roommate, Phil rolled over on his stomach so that he could look at his sister. "But it was funny blackmail."

She groaned. Finally curiosity pricked at her, and she asked, "What was the big secret anyway?"

"I dunno. Tom wouldn't tell us."

Really. That was … interesting. It must've been _good_ blackmail.

"This is a lot of trouble over a stupid party," she observed.

He glared. "Easy for you to say! Just give the frat boys a smile, and they'll let you in whether you're on the guest list or not. It's not quite that simple for us guys."

"Details, details." She grinned.

He scowled in return. But they both knew he didn't mean it.

When Phil ended up leaving for his own dorm room, about an hour later, Lil immediately went to the phone. The other end rang three times before he picked up.

"Hello?" He sounded groggy.

"Your roommate says that you've been blackmailing relatives lately."

He groaned. "Hi, Lillian."

"Well?"

He must have been able to hear the edge in her voice, because he said, "It was all a bluff, Lil. I wasn't going to tell. I just wanted Angie to think I was."

Lil allowed herself a small smile. "So … there _is_ an actual secret, then."

There was a pause on the other end, as Tom realized his mistake.

"What I don't understand," she continued, deciding to let Tom off the hook for the time being, "is why this party's so important. I mean, for Phil, sure. He's Phil. But why does Tom Pickles care about a stupid frat party?"

He responded quickly, "I don't. It's not about me."

"Oh?"

"It's for Chuck, okay?" He sighed. "He needs to get out more. He never really made friends last year, when we were still in high school, and now he's moved off-campus. He's self-isolating. It's not healthy."

She considered. That sounded like Chuck, sure enough. But … "But a frat party is healthy? Come on, Tom."

"It's a start. It's something." He fell silent. When he spoke again, his voice sounded hopeful. "So, you still mad at me?"

Almost against her will a smile formed on her face. She wasn't. She couldn't be. Especially not after learning his motivation for this whole fiasco. But she also couldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing he'd won.

"Good-night, Tom." And with that, she placed the phone receiver gently back in its cradle.

---

Author's Notes: Last chapter wasn't meant to be an endorsement of smoking—I'm an ex-smoker, myself, and giving up the cigs was one of my best decisions ever—but for some reason, I just saw Angelica and Chuckie growing up to become smokers. Maybe because they're both a little high-strung.


	6. Consistency

**Chapter 6: Consistency**

"You again."

"Looks like."

Angelica checked her watch then gave him a skeptical look. "Are you always here this time of day?"

Chuck nodded. "I like consistency. It's reassuring."

"Consistency is boring."

"_I'm_ boring."

That made her laugh. It was her real laugh, the deep throaty one that sometimes made her snort, and not the fake laugh, that was higher-pitched and tinkled like broken glass. "Touché," she said. Then she frowned. "You're not stalking me, are you, Finster?"

It was his turn to laugh. "No. Not even a little bit." He smiled. "You have class in a few minutes, right?"

"Um, yeah. Why?"

"Well, I got out of class about five minutes ago. The professor always lets us out late, and by then I'm in serious need of a nicotine fix. So I stick around a little longer to smoke, and you show up a little early to smoke." He grinned, pleased with himself. "No stalking. Just class schedules."

She rolled her eyes. "Brilliant, Holmes, just brilliant." Then she realized something. "Y'know, I don't see you smoking. Though you _claim_ to be on a smoke break."

With an exaggerated flourish, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his pack. "I was waiting for you." He handed her a cigarette. "I owe you, after all."

She accepted. They smoked.

"Oh," she said suddenly, "when you get the chance, tell my dearly beloved cousin that I have come through for him. Yet again."

He looked at her. "We're on the guest list?"

"You're on the guest list."

He smiled, then frowned. "Um, Angie? I hope you, uh, didn't have to—"

That's all he had to say, because Angelica had always had the uncanny ability to seemingly read his mind. "Oh, for Pete's sake, Finster! This is not _Pretty Woman_, and I am not Julia Roberts. No, no, no. All I did was ask Matt out to dinner." She shot him a dirty look. "And trust me, old Matt's no Richard Gere."

Chuck held up his hands to placate her. "Sorry! Sorry! I guess what I meant to say was thank you. So … thank you."

Angelica finished her cigarette and headed up the stair. "You're welcome," she called over her shoulder, the ghost of a smile flashing across her face.


	7. Party Crashing 101

**Chapter 7: Party Crashing 101**

"You're crazy," she complained.

"I know. Isn't it great?" He shot her a lop-sided grin as they walked along the sidewalk. "Don't worry. This is gonna be fun."

She rolled her eyes. "C'mon, Dil. A frat party?" She looked down at what she was wearing. Red and black stockings, black skirt, pink Hello Kitty baby-doll shirt. Though she couldn't see her hair, because her eyes couldn't roll back that far in her head, this week it happened to be blue. Sighing, she continued, "Frat boys, Dil. Frat boys! Could this be any less our scene?"

Dil remained undeterred. "Kim, I'm gonna be honest with you. You deserve no less." He paused. "This is my chance to score a college hottie."

Kim stopped walking and spun around. "Have a nice life, Dylan."

"Wait!" Dil grabbed her arm, and she turned to face him. "Please, Kim. We'll get you a hot guy too. Fair is fair."

She glared at him. He could be so stupid sometimes. It was infuriating and made strangling him a very attractive option.

Weakly he smiled. "You're my best friend," he said, trying again. "And I want to go to this party. Yeah, I know wanting to go is silly. Maybe I'm just jealous that all my friends are finally grown up, finally in college, and I'm not. Whatever the reason, I'd still like to go." He reached out and took her hand. "But not without you. I won't have any fun if you're not there."

Kim looked down at their joined hands. He was stupid but sweet. She felt herself relenting.

"I mean," Dil continued, "someone's gotta protect me from the frat boys, right?"

Giving in and laughing, she looked up and saw the frat house down the street. "How are we even getting in?" she asked, changing topics. "We don't have student IDs."

"Oh, that one's easy. You just flash 'em a smile and say that we forgot them."

Kim snorted. "Like that'll work."

"Sure it will. I mean, look at you. You're absolutely gorgeous. They'll be putty in our hands." He grinned his goofy grin. "Putty, I say!"

Despite herself, Kim felt her heart skip a beat. Definitely stupid but sweet. Only with the utmost self-restraint did she stop herself from grabbing him by his knit hat and kissing him. Instead she followed him down to the frat house, where the party was already in full swing.

---

Author's Notes: Thanks for the compliments! I love writing for Angie—she's quite fun—and I do hope that I've been doing her justice. Because if I haven't, I'm sure she'll come kick my butt.

Oh, and just to clarify my warnings … next few chapters will have underage drinking, specifically. Ye have been warned.


	8. Wallflowers of the World, Unite

**Chapter 8: Wallflowers of the World, Unite**

For some time now, Susie had sat perched on the porch railing of the frat house, sipping her beer and kicking her legs idly against the rail slats. It was a good location. She got to see a lot here on the porch. For example, when Dil Pickles and Kim Finster approached the house, she got to see them sweet-talk their way into the party. It was all very interesting. She hoped, for the sake of everyone concerned, that they didn't run into their respective brothers. 

"Bored?"

Startled out of her reverie, she almost fell off, but he grabbed her arm and held her up. Once she regained her balance, Susie shot Phil a grateful smile. "A little bored," she admitted. She nodded towards the front door. "It's too loud to talk, too crowded to dance."

Phil hopped up beside her on the railing. "I'm bored too," he offered. "I feel kinda … out of place."

"So why'd you come?"

"Tom wanted to." He grinned, leaning forward to get a better look at her in the dark. She could smell the cigarette smoke in his hair and beer on his shirt, but she didn't mind. "It was supposed to be about getting Chuck to live a little. Y'know, be more social. But I lost track of both of them pretty much as soon as we got here."

Susie laughed. "Yeah, same with me and Angie. She wanted me to go with her so What's-His-Face—"

"Matt?"

"Yeah. That's the guy." She paused to offer him her beer. He took a sip and handed it back. "She asked me to tag along so Matt wouldn't get the wrong idea. About her liking him or anything. But, lo and behold, turns out she and Matt have hit it off, so my company's become unwelcome."

He let out a low, sympathetic whistle. "Rough!"

"You're telling me." She grinned and lifted her beer in a toast. "So! Here's to us, the wallflowers."

Phil shook his head and smiled. Even in the dim porch light, Susie could see his eyes crinkle at the corners. "Nuh-uh," he said resolutely. "Me a wallflower? Sure. But you? No way. You're Susie Carmichael. You come second to nobody."

She glanced down at the beer in her hands. A small smile played on her lips.

Cheerfully he continued, "I mean, you're the girl who could speak multiple languages at age three. You are one impressive chica." His grin widened as he deadpanned, "_Chica_ is Spanish, by the way."

She thought for a minute, sipping her beer. "Phil?"

"Yeah?"

She turned to face him. "You're a goofball."

He nodded, completely unoffended.

And he _was_ a goofball. His hair was as ratty and messy as it had always been, and his clothes hung a bit too loose on his relatively small frame. But he also had the kindest brown eyes she'd ever seen. Without thinking she asked, "Hey, do you wanna ditch the party?"

He cocked his head at her. "And go where?"

"How about karaoke?" she blurted out.

"Sounds good." He jerked his thumb towards the door. "S'alright if I try to find Tom or Chuck real quick, to tell them I'm bailing?"

"Sure thing. After all, gives me time to finish this," she explained, holding up her beer.

After he hopped off the porch rail and disappeared back inside, Susie downed her beer in one long swallow and wondered what on earth she was doing. Had she just asked out Philip DeVille? The boy who used to eat worms? Yes. Yes, she had. And worse yet, she didn't regret it a bit.

---

Author's Notes: Glad folks are enjoying Dil and Kim, even if they are a bit unorthodox a pairing. Here's hoping Phil and Susie gel too. Thanks for reading!

By the way, I've condensed the first six chapters into one section, but the content's the same.


	9. Escape from Alcatraz

**Chapter 9: Escape from Alcatraz**

Growling, Angelica pushed her way through the dance floor, trying to get to the front door. She was trying desperately to lose Matt—or, as she'd come to think of him, Mr. Pending Sexual Harassment Lawsuit. And after she'd lost Matt, she was going to murder Tom. This was, after all, entirely her stupid cousin's fault.

And where in blazes had Susie gone? Some best friend _she_ was. Angelica hadn't seen her in at least an hour.

"Hey, Angelica!"

Well, damn. She'd gotten so close to the door, too.

She turned with a smile plastered across her face. "Matthew!" she yelled over the pulsing dance music. "There you are! I've been looking all over."

And lo and behold, there he was, in all his creepy glory. Tall and broad, dark hair, dark eyes, too-wide smile. She'd been rather infatuated with him through most of dinner, until he smiled right into her eyes while running his nasty sweaty palms up her inner thigh. Now those groping hands were holding two plastic cups of beer. Grinning, he handed her one, and she reluctantly accepted it.

As he leaned forward to speak, his face disturbingly close to hers, Angelica's eyes nervously scanned the room. Surely there had to be someone she knew nearby, someone who she must conveniently go talk to. But she didn't see anyone she recognized. Maybe it was the dim lighting. Stupid frat parties.

Then Matt leaned forward a little further, and his lips touched her skin. As he kissed her neck, an involuntary shiver immediately ran through her. He seemed to misinterpret this as a shiver of pleasure, and she felt one of his hands grab her waist and pull her towards him.

All right. Enough was enough. She placed her hands on his chest and shoved, hard. He staggered back a half-step and stared at her with a dumbfounded expression. "What? What's wrong?" He sounded more annoyed than concerned.

"I'm not a piece of meat, that's what's wrong," she snapped, taking a step back and keeping her hands in front of her.

For a beat or two, he kept looking at her with uncomprehending eyes. "But … I took you out to dinner," Matt said and, just as her jaw dropped in disbelief at his chutzpah, he threw his beer in her face. Then he stormed off, back across the crowded dance floor.

Angelica was so stunned that it took few seconds to recover enough to lob her plastic cup at the back of his head. By then he was out of range, and instead she hit a tall redheaded girl, who shot her a death glare. Before the redhead could do anything further, Angelica decided to return to her original plan and beat a hasty retreat.

It was when she'd almost reached the front door that she caught sight of Tom and his little friends. Great. _Now_ she found them. Maybe she could get out the door without them seeing her—

"Hey! Angie!"

There was a theme in the makings here. Perhaps karma was involved. Angelica turned to see Tom trotting over to her, with Lillian DeVille and Chuck Finster on his heels. Larry, Curly, and Moe. Idly she wondered where Phil was.

She glared at them, because they were there and she felt like glaring. "I got you into this party," she complained. "Shouldn't you be off enjoying yourselves and leaving me the hell alone?"

"Relax. Just came over to say thanks." Tom grinned good-naturedly. Then he cocked his head and asked, "Why is your face wet?"

Instead of answering, she spun on her heel and headed out the door. She was definitely going to murder Tom, she decided.

---

Author's Notes: I'm s0 sorry for the problems created by condensing chapters! I've changed everything back to how it was before, so hopefully that'll solve that. I might condense again once the story's finished but not 'til then.

Also, I hadn't realized that anonymous comments were off—they're on, now, so comment anonymously all to your heart's desire. Thanks for reading!


	10. Weirdness

**Chapter 10: Weirdness**

"Well, that was weird."

Lil nodded. "But isn't she always?"

Tom nodded back. Then he clapped a friendly hand on Chuck's shoulder. Startled, Chuck jumped a little so Tom gave his friend a reassuring grin. "You having a good time, Chuck?"

"Sure!" Chuck ran a nervous hand through his thick red hair. He stared at the front door. "Of course I'm having a good time."

Tom didn't believe him for a second.

Chuck nodded towards the door. "Mind if I step out for a minute?" He gave an apologetic smile. "I need a smoke."

"Sure," said Tom, a little doubtfully. "Want some company?"

"Oh, no, no. No need to leave the party on my account."

Lil raised an eyebrow while Tom crossed his arms over his chest.

"I'll just be a minute," Chuck insisted.

As he watched his friend scurry off, Tom let out a deep sigh. "So much for the plan," he muttered, feeling defeated.

Lil nodded sympathetically. "Good try, though."

"Well! Guess it's just you and me." Tom frowned. "Haven't seen your brother in forever."

"Oh, Phil's fine. He probably just went to the bathroom and got lost on his way back."

Laughing, Tom shrugged his shoulders. "Could be. Wanna go get another beer?"

"Thought you'd never ask." Lil laughed too. As they pushed and slid their way through the throngs of fellow students towards the bar, Tom stole a glance in Lil's direction. She was wearing a turtleneck sweater in autumnal colors, with her rich brown hair swept up into a casual bun. No make-up, because years ago Lillian had grown tired with the maintenance it required. He wondered how such seeming carelessness could result in such incredible beauty.

Wait. Beauty? Where the hell had _that_ thought come from?

Lil caught him staring at her and once again raised an eyebrow. That eyebrow, that wonderful sarcastic eyebrow, it really was something of a calling card for her. Tom flashed his widest grin, the grin that rendered even junior-year women weak in the knees. And Lillian, utterly immune, burst out laughing.

For a moment Tom's grin faltered, but then it came back twice as strong. He had to admire a girl who would laugh right in his face. Actually, he _did_ admire that girl, he realized. He admired her much more than was entirely healthy for their long-time platonic friendship.

---

Author's Notes: Tom and Lil are currently just friends … but for how much longer? Hmm.


	11. One Way or Another

**Chapter 11: One Way or Another**

He knew she'd be on the porch, smoking a cigarette while leaning on the railing. He was a smoker too. He understood. Nicotine was a great friend during times of adversity.

For a few moments he watched her. The silver hoops in her ears glittered in the moonlight, and she kept tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulder with an air of impatience. After finishing her cigarette, she flicked the butt over the railing and reached into her pack for another. Frowning, she turned the pack upside down and shook. Empty.

"Dammit," she muttered. But she sounded more upset than angry.

Chuck took a step forward, reaching into his coat pocket. He pulled out his own pack of cigarettes and held out his arm to her. He took another step forward, then she saw him. Eyes narrowing down to little slits, she glanced from his face to the cigarettes and back again.

"Smokers' code," he explained in perfect deadpan.

"Go away." She turned back to the railing. "I don't want to talk to you right now."

He took out his lighter and lit a cigarette. "Okay," he agreed, "so we won't talk." He took a few puffs then offered it to her.

She glared at him but took it. She leaned her elbows on the railing, looking out into the street, while he leaned back, looking into the house. He lit another cigarette for himself. They smoked.

"You must be thrilled," Angelica said finally, still not facing him. "You finally got your revenge on bad old Angelica Pickles. You got to see me humiliated." Her voice grew bitter. "Did you know he was such a jerk?"

Chuck didn't even need to ask who she meant. "I've always thought Matt's a jerk, but I never thought he'd be a jerk to you. I promise. And I've never wanted to see you get embarrassed." He sighed and concluded, "So, no, I'm _not_ thrilled."

She snorted. "Finster, why the hell are you here?"

He flicked some ash from the end of his cigarette. He wasn't sure how to answer that. He wasn't sure he wanted to. "Because I care," he said, deciding that this answer was as close to the truth as he dared get.

She snorted again and, despite himself, he chuckled. Bad move. She turned to glare at him, and he flinched. Then he perked up again. "Hey! Hear that?"

"All I hear is 'Taps' playing at your funeral," she growled.

"No, seriously." He jerked his head towards the door. "They're playing Blondie's 'One Way or Another.'"

She shrugged. "So?"

"I just … know you like the song," he murmured, almost to himself. He thought about the time, many years ago, she'd taken over a sushi restaurant and sang karaoke. Though at the time he'd been glad it wasn't him getting in trouble, he'd admired her a little for it too. It took chutzpah to sing to an entire restaurant. And even then, Angelica Pickles had it, and Chuck Finster respected her for it.

Not much had changed since then, actually.

He dropped his cigarette butt on the porch and ground it out with his heel. When he looked up, he saw that she'd turned around and was looking at him. Looking _through_ him. He wondered what she was thinking about.

"You know," she began softly, "that was a great trip."

Again with the mind-reading. How could someone who seemed to think so little of him also know him so well? "It certainly worked out well for me and Dad." He paused. "Jury's still out on what Kim and Mom think."

She laughed at that, and he grinned, feeling bolder.

"Angie?"

"Hmm?" She took one last drag on her cigarette then flicked the butt over the railing.

Chuck stood indecisively for a moment, torn between hope and fear. Then he took a deep breath, let it slowly out, and did the bravest thing he had done in his life to date. He asked Angelica Pickles to dance with him.

Author's Notes: So here's where I must confess, shame-facedly, to being A Bad Rugrats Fan™. When I was double-checking to make sure I'd gotten the context right for this song, I found out that in fact I hadn't—"One Way or Another" is from the first movie, while the song Angelica sings in the karaoke restaurant is "Bad Girls" from the second movie. Yikes!

I thought about adjusting things to fit the canon but decided to just leave as-is. "One Way or Another" works much better in context with the rest of this story, and it's even been incorporated into the title. My sincere apologies for the inaccuracy, though.


	12. The Stars

**Chapter 12: The Stars**

Leaning back, propping himself up on his elbows, Dil gazed up at the stars. It was a clear night, and the tiny pinpricks of light blinked down at him.

"See anything? E.T., maybe?"

He smiled. Reputations died hard, apparently. Even with best friends. "I see possibility," he said, turning to look at Kim.

She smiled back and took a sip of beer. She titled her head back and looked at the stars too. "They're pretty," she murmured.

"Yeah." The smile dropped from his face. His fingers drummed nervously against the stone wall he was sitting on. "Kim, I'm sorry I dragged you here. The party kinda sucks."

"No! I mean, well, yeah. The party does." She chuckled a little, her dark eyes sparkling. "But I'm glad I came. First, it's made me really glad that I decided to go to community college, because all this is so totally not for me. Second, we got free beer. And third, it's a nice night."

For a moment they both watched the sky in silence. The muted thumping of a dance beat came from inside the house, but out on the back patio the soft hooting of a faraway owl was more audible. Nearby a couple made out drunkenly, but otherwise Dil and Kim had the backyard to themselves.

Dil's smile slowly returned. "Yeah," he said, almost to himself. "It really is a nice night."

"Hey, Dil?"

"Hmm?"

Kim paused, then asked, "Are you drunk?"

"What?" He turned to look at her. Her eyes were intense, but otherwise her face was inscrutable. He shook his head, still smiling. "I've had less than a beer. Of course I'm not drunk."

"Good." She took a deep breath. "Because I really want to kiss you."

Dil blinked stupidly for a moment. This was unexpected. But—he realized almost in the same instant—not unwelcome. "Think that'll make things weird between us?" he said mock-seriously.

Picking up on his light tone, Kim grinned. "Probably."

"Just checking," he replied and leaned forward. A small gasp escaped her just before their lips met. She tasted vaguely of strawberries, and Dil had always loved strawberries.

---

Author's Notes: Thanks for being so understanding about last chapter's mix-up. I am _so_ firing my fact-checker, lemme tell ya.


	13. Knight in Shining Armor

**Chapter 13: Knight in Shining Armor**

Things had come to a very bad end, no doubt about it. It was a reflection of the entire evening, really. Dancing with Charles Finster was only the culmination of a series of bad occurrences.

But fortunately for all parties concerned, he was surprisingly adept at keeping off of Angelica's feet. Also adept at keeping his hands to himself, which was good because otherwise Angelica would have maimed him. He was even bopping his head mostly in time with the pulsing baseline of the song. And he'd remembered that she sang this song when she was three years old. He'd _remembered_, and for some reason that made her smile. Just a little.

Leaning in close enough she could smell the cigarette smoke in his hair, she shouted above the music, "Not too shabby, Chuck."

He locked eyes with her and grinned. It was his half-proud, half-embarrassed grin—his standard response to a compliment. Angelica rolled her eyes, but it was mostly out of habit. The truth was, dancing with Chuck was the most fun she'd had all night. Of course, that wasn't saying much, considering that her night had started off with a disaster of a date …

Egads. Apparently to even think of the troll was to summon him. Because there Matt was again, over by the bar, staring a little too intently at her and Chuck. As he pushed away the bar and started wobbling over, Angelica tensed. Oh, no. Her eyes darted back and forth between Chuck and a rapidly approaching Matt. For a few interminably long moments, a clueless Chuck just squinted at her in the dark, trying to puzzle things out. He only turned to look behind his shoulder in time for Matt's fist to meet his face.

As Chuck stumbled backwards and fell, Angelica automatically leapt forward. Before Matt could do any more damage, she grabbed his wrist and, with a quick twirl around, flipped him over her back. He landed with a dull thud that could be heard even over the dance music. Carefully Angelica placed one stiletto heel on his chest, leaning forward so that some of her weight pushed the heel's sharp point down a little, just for effect. Even in the dark she could see Matt wince in pain.

Thank goodness her sorority had chosen to cosponsor Take Back the Night last year. Otherwise, she might never have taken that self-defense class.

---

Author's Notes: As always, thanks for reading!


	14. Duet

**Chapter 14: Duet**

His hands were sweating like a wooly mammoth going for a jog in the Sahara. It made it hard for him to hold on to the microphone.

A single spotlight shone down on the stage, making him sweat even more. He looked out at the sparse audience, mostly drunk college guys, and grinned gamely. The drunk guys ignored him, but over in a corner Susie shot him the thumbs-up gesture. Then he turned to the television monitor near the karaoke deejay, where the words "Wannabe" and "The Spice Girls" appeared on an otherwise plain blue screen.

Phil grinned again. He should never have let Susie pick the song for him.

As the lyrics scrolled on-screen, he tried to keep up, but the song was a little too up-tempo for him to sing entirely in-synch. Meanwhile, a few of the drunk guys started paying attention and immediately segregated into two opposed, warring factions: the booers and the laughers. The guys booing sounded louder to Phil, but it was hard to tell from the stage. He couldn't hear Susie, whether booing or laughing, over the din.

By the time the song had ended, he'd finally almost found the right key. Oh, well. He took a large bow, which prompted more booing and laughter, then jumped down. The deejay called out Susie's name and, as they passed—her heading towards the stage, him heading towards their table in the corner—she reached out and gave his bicep a friendly squeeze.

She leaned in close and, her lips brushing his ear, said, "You did good, DeVille."

Shivering a little at her nearness, Phil grinned. "Thanks, Carmichael. Now get up there and blow us all away."

Susie winked and, sadly but inevitably, let go of his arm. As she made her way onstage, the drunk guys started cheering and catcalling a bit. Phil bit his lip, feeling a little worried, but admitted that he agreed with the drunks in their appreciation of Susie if not their verbalization of said appreciation. But then the music cued up—"One Way or Another," an excellent choice—and the guys in front shut up the second Susie opened her mouth.

Which surprised Phil not at all. Susie's voice was something else. Smooth like molten lava, her voice caressed the lyrics of the Blondie song. As he listened to her sing, he felt his chest tighten. Her voice was beautiful. _She_ was beautiful.

When she finished the song, the entire bar burst into applause. Susie smiled a little, her white teeth flashing under the stage lights, and she curtsied a little. As she stepped down and made her way back to the corner booth, Phil sat back and decided he definitely had to get her flowers. But not roses. Roses were too cliché. Her smile got wider as she got nearer, and for some reason, it reminded him of sunflowers.

Sunflowers would do nicely.

---

Author's Notes: Thought I'd throw in another chapter, since the last one was so short.


	15. Convergence

**Chapter 15: Convergence**

The music had cut off, and sirens could be heard from a distance. Stunned, Lillian arrived at the dance floor just in time to see Angelica haul a bloodied, glasses-less Chuck to his feet and start dragging him towards the back door. Lil somewhat roughly shoved her way through the equally-stunned crowd, with Tom hot on her heels. 

As soon as there were out on the back patio, Tom exploded, roaring, "Angelica Pickles! What did you _do_ to my best friend?"

Even in the dark, Angelica's glare was perfectly visible, the whites of her eyes glowing. "I didn't do anything!" she snapped. "In fact, I saved his sorry ass." She rifled through her purse, yanked out a tissue, and shoved it at Chuck. "Tell 'em, Finster."

Gingerly Chuck took the tissue and held it up to his nose. He nodded while wincing at the pain. Angelica's tone changed from indignation to regret, as she added softly, "Matt did this to him."

Tom's jaw tightened visibly at this revelation, and Lil looked away, muttering something that sounded very much like "bastard." Meanwhile, Chuck sat down weakly on the patio wall and groaned.

"Oh, my God! Chuck!"

Four heads whirled around, and four pairs of eyes went wide at the sight of an equally surprised Kim Finster and Dil Pickles not ten feet away. For several moments no one spoke, silently exchanging confused glances with one another. Then everyone began talking at once.

"Dil, what are you _doing_ here?"

"What did you do to my brother? I swear, if you—"

"Guys … "

"Kim, calm down, really I'm—"

"How many times do I have to explain that I didn't hurt one precious red hair on his stupid head? Jeez, Kim!"

"Guys … "

"Relax, Tom, I didn't get into any trouble. It's just a party."

"You're only seventeen!"

"Oh, come on—you're only eighteen!"

"_Guys!_" All eyes shifted over to Lil, who'd finally, successfully shouted over them. She was standing with her hands on her hips, looking irritated. She pointed towards the door. "You hear that?"

They all cocked their heads, listening intently, but it was Tom who answered. "Lil, I don't hear anything."

"Exactly. The sirens have stopped, which means the cops are here."

Kim cleared her throat. "I parked my car—well, Dad's minivan, same difference—about two blocks from here." She glanced worriedly at her older brother. "Let's get the heck out of Dodge and get you to a hospital."

She wrapped an arm around his waist and, his arm around her shoulders, supported part of his weight, while Angelica moved to Chuck's other side and did the same. Slowly, mindful of Chuck's traditionally low pain threshold, the group headed out the backyard gate and down the street.

They were halfway to the minivan when Angelica turned her head and gave Kim an appraising look. "Back on the patio," she said, carefully enunciating each syllable, "were you holding Dil's hand?"

---

Author's Notes: There _will_ be more TommyLil, I swear it. But unfortunately they're probably the couple who gets the least "screen time" in this little story. Then again, everyone's kinda taking a backseat to Chuckie and Angelica here. It's because Angie threatened them, y'know, so they're too scared to ask for more time in the story.


	16. The Trouble with Brothers

**Chapter 16: The Trouble with Brothers**

Sighing softly, Dil drummed his fingers on the armrests of the incredibly uncomfortable plastic waiting room chair he was sitting in. He wasn't used to having to stay so still for so long. It was _boring_. Besides, next to him he could feel Kim almost dripping with anxiety. He reached over and placed his hand over hers, giving a small squeeze, and she looked up and offered a wan smile.

Tom glanced over at them and muttered, "I'm never gonna get used to you two. This is so out of the blue."

Dil rolled his eyes. "Actually, it's not. Since you left for college, Kim and I have been hanging out a lot more." He paused and turned to look at Tom. "And you'd _know_ that if you bothered to ever call or email me."

Leaning over, Lil whispered, "Busted," in Tom's ear. He glared at her briefly then switched over to glaring at Dil. "I totally call and email," he said huffily.

"Oh, bull."

"Stop it, both of you," Kim growled. Dil flinched when her eyes focused in on him like a laser beam. "Dil, stop being a dumbass, and just admit that you miss your brother." Then she turned to his brother. "And Tom, stop being a dumbass, and start calling Dil more often. I know you're a big man on campus now, but family's family."

Lil made an interesting choking noise as she stifled a laugh.

Before anyone could respond further, Angelica strode into the waiting area, waves of irritation pouring off her like heat from the sun. "They threw me out of the room," she complained. "Me, Angelica Pickles! They whisked Chuck off to take some x-rays, but I have no idea what's happening otherwise." She plunked down next to Lil and crossed her arms over her chest.

Kim gave a tight nod, and Dil squeezed her hand again. "Thanks for the update," she said. "Any luck reaching Susie?"

"Because we haven't been able to get Phil," Lil added, with a worried edge to her voice. "His phone's still turned off."

"Yes, actually." Angelica's bad mood slid away suddenly, and a very cat-like smile—the smile that Dil had dreaded since childhood—spread over her lips. "She's on her way over, and you just would not believe who she's with." Her eyes cut meaningfully over to Lil.

The look didn't escape unnoticed. Lil's eyes, filled with a suspicion deeply-nurtured over the years, bored into the side of Angelica's head. "Who is Susie with, Angie?"

"Why, none other than Philip DeVille."

As Lil's jaw fell open, Tom burst into laughter. "Looks like I'm not the only one who doesn't know what's going on with my brother."

---

Author's Notes: I know the plot has been developing at a somewhat languid pace, but this is a "beginnings" story. Next chapter, however, will see some rather interesting developments with our star couple.


	17. Secrets and Confessions

**Chapter 17: Secrets and Confessions**

Chuck couldn't decide which hurt more: his face or his pride. It was hard to judge. Both hurt pretty bad. On the one hand, his face throbbed with a dull fire—his eyes, his nose, his cheeks. On the other hand, he'd gotten sucker-punched, lost his glasses, and carried to safety by his baby sister and his childhood nemesis. Not to mention that he was currently sitting in a cold hospital room wearing nothing but a thin paper gown. At this point, his only remaining hope was that his nose wasn't broken.

The door cracked open, and Chuck's head shot up. But instead of a nurse or an x-ray technician, it was Angelica, holding two cups of coffee. She bumped the door closed with her hip and, after handing Chuck a coffee, hopped up on the examination table beside him.

Chuck smiled as he took a sip. It tasted fantastic.

Meanwhile, Angelica gave him an appraising look. "It was hell sneaking past the nurses' station, lemme tell ya. So you better drink every last drop."

"I will. Thanks," he said, wincing a little at the pain talking produced in his upper jaw.

It didn't go unnoticed. As he looked up from his coffee, he saw Angelica staring at him. "When will you ever learn to shut up," she sighed. "Just sit back, and I'll do all the talking." Chuck raised an eyebrow and wondered how this was any different from usual, but a glaring Angelica pressed onward, "I'll tell you a story. A story about my cousin Thomas."

"Is this a story that he'd be okay with me hearing?"

"Definitely. Trust me on this." Angelica chuckled and flipped her hair over her shoulder. "I was sixteen and, while young and fabulous, also somewhat foolish. That's sixteen for you. One of the most foolish things I did was to keep a diary."

"Wait, wait, wait. Is this about the secret that Tom talked about at your sorority house?"

An eyebrow shot up. As she took a slow sip from her coffee, she asked in a dark tone, "Do you want to hear the story or don't you, Finster?"

He hadn't actually expressed any desire to hear the story to begin with, but he felt it wise not to point this out. He nodded for her to continue.

"All right. Thank you. Now, this diary was my best friend since my Cynthia doll, and I told it everything. So very inadvisable. My mother always said to never put incriminating things in writing, and I should have listened to her." She sighed, reminiscing. "Anyways, among other things, I confessed to my dear diary that I had very inconvenient feelings for a boy I never should have liked."

Chuck snorted, then winced again at the resulting pain. "He wasn't rich enough for you?"

Angelica shot him another withering glare. "Well, no. He wasn't. But he was also very much not a part of my scene. And you know how important those things were to me then."

"Were? Try 'still are.'"

"Perhaps. Perhaps not." Angelica's voice turned serious, contemplative. "It wasn't even mostly that he wasn't as rich or wasn't as popular. It was … the thing was, Chuck, he was better than me. Kind. Loyal. Resilient. And nobody seemed to really appreciate these things, nobody saw but me."

Sipping his coffee, he pondered. "Was it Harold? Because you know Harold came out as gay last year, right?"

Angelica sighed deeply. "No, it wasn't Harold. Focus here, Chuck!"

"Sorry."

"Oh, you _will_ be." She seemed skeptical of Chuck's contrition but continued anyways, "Now the scene turns to my dear, beloved cousins. Darling cousin number one, the weirdo, dared darling cousin number two, the idiot, to steal aforementioned diary. Which he did and found out lots of things that he should not have."

Chuck couldn't completely hide the grin that was threatening to break out. That was fantastic. He found himself feeling a renewed respect for Tom and Dil. Then something occurred to him, and he frowned. "So, if there were lots of juicy details, what's the big deal about this one secret?"

"Excellent question, Finster." As something between a smirk and a smile caused her lips to curve upwards, Angelica leaned forward. She stared into his eyes in that odd way she had that made it seem that she could see down to his very core. "Tom focused on this particular secret because he had a personal stake. He was worried I'd hurt the poor guy." She paused. Something in her expression changed, and Chuck found that he couldn't decipher it at all. "Y'know, Tom was probably right," she added, almost as an afterthought.

Leaning back and feeling a little unsettled, Chuck let out a nervous laugh. "But that doesn't make sense, Angelica. Why would Tom care about your mystery crush?"

Angelica looked away. "Because," she said, still faintly smiling, "it was _you_."

---

Author's Notes: Ooh, cliffhanger. Sorry for the wait, hope it was worth it (though never fear, there's more to come)—I've been having a devil of a time getting Fanfiction to upload lately. This chapter's for my loyal reviewers, Digital Damita and Acosta Perez Jose Ramiro. Thanks for sticking around so long!


	18. Hail, Hail, the Gang's All Here

**Chapter 18: Hail, Hail, the Gang's All Here**

Pulling into a parking space, Susie cut the engine on her convertible and yanked out the key. She glanced over at her passenger and saw an uncustomary, worried expression on his face.

"Hey," she said softly, and Phil glanced up. "Angie said he's gonna be just fine. Just a black eye and maybe—_maybe_—a broken nose. Might look like he went a few rounds with Mike Tyson, but that's all."

Phil sighed. "Right. Thanks." He opened his door and slid out, then trotted over to Susie's side. As she got out and smoothed down her clothes, he shut her door for her. She smiled. With another guy, the gesture might have been possessive or creepy, but with Phil, it was just sweet. Catching her smile, Phil gave her an exaggerated, goofy wink.

They started walking towards the hospital's main entrance, and Susie felt his fingers brush against her hand as they walked side by side. She cut her eyes over to him, but he was looking straight ahead, seemingly oblivious. Bullshit. But if that's how Phil was going to play, that was fine with her. Susie Carmichael was an undisputed master of this game. Phil DeVille didn't stand a chance.

The hospital was huge. For a good ten minutes, the pair wandered around the corridors, occasionally checking signs and asking for directions. Then Phil stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes riveted to a spot some ten yards away. Puzzled, Susie followed his gaze—restrooms, flower and gift shop, cafeteria. Nothing to do with the emergency room.

"Phil? You okay?"

His focus snapped back to her. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." He offered her a sheepish grin and, pointing, added, "I just, uh, need to use the restroom."

"Oh, sure thing. I'll try to track down the ER for us," Susie replied. How weird. And how very unlike Phil, to be embarrassed about a little thing like using the bathroom.

But she shook it off and continued down the hall. Finally, to her considerable relief, she spotted a sign for the emergency room. Almost the second she was through the doors, a small army jumped out of their chairs to rush over. Susie put on a smile that was only somewhat shaky.

Tom reached her first. "Where have you two _been_?"

"And what have you done with my brother?" demanded Lillian, glancing around.

Susie took a deep breath. Okay. She was Susie Carmichael—could do this. She looked to Tom first. "First off, I'm so sorry about Chuck. I just can't believe anyone would ever want to hurt him," she said, then turned to give Lil the friendliest look she could muster. "And second, Phil's just using the bathroom. That's all."

Skeptically the others studied Susie's face. Tom leaned in to whisper something in her ear while Kim snorted a little. Susie raised an eyebrow when she noticed Dil's arm around Kim's shoulders, and she briefly wondered just how good a time those two had had at the party.

The incestuous nature of this little group's dating dynamics was really something else, she reflected. Her and Phil … Kim and Dil … then Susie frowned, realizing that there were a few players missing. Just as Lil was preparing to launch into a lecture, Susie cut her off, asking with faux casualness, "So where is Angie? She seemed pretty ticked over the phone, so I figured she'd be lying in wait for me."

Tom nodded towards a nearby hallway. "She's in with Chuck, while he's waiting for all his test results." Then his eyes narrowed, and he added, almost in a growl, "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason," Susie lied with a grin. It was time to make a break for it before Tom got too nosy. She took a step back, muttering something about going to find Phil, then quickly fled.

She wasn't three steps out of the ER before she saw him. Smiling in relief, she opened her mouth to ask where he'd been. Then she immediately shut it again. In front of her Phil was standing with a large grin and a bouquet of sunflowers tied together with a single, shiny white ribbon.

"For me?" she asked, unable to hide her surprise.

Phil nodded, holding out the flowers "For you."

Still smiling, Susie took the sunflowers. She ran her fingers over their soft petals. The flowers were large, colorful, happy. Not unlike Phil, actually. As Susie looked up to thank him, she saw his soft brown eyes just inches away and, a moment later, felt his soft lips against hers.

---

Author's Notes: Since Fanfiction's letting me update again, thought I'd get in another chapter ASAP.


	19. Speechless

**Chapter 19: Speechless**

Finishing the last swallow of coffee, Angelica stared at the back of the hospital room door, where there was a poster proclaiming Chuck's rights as a patient. Next to her on the table she could feel Chuck shift in discomfort, his paper gown crinkling loudly, and his thigh brushed up against hers. Her breath caught at the sudden contact.

"Angie?"

Why had she told him that story? She'd asked herself that question even during the telling. There was still no good reason.

"What is it, Finster?" But that wasn't what she'd meant to say. Wasn't what she _wanted_ to say.

"Why did you … I mean, do you still … uh, back then, when you … " Tongue-tied, Chuck trailed off with a loud frustrated sigh, and had it been in another context, Angelica would have laughed.

But it wasn't in another context. She shut her eyes. So very inadvisable. After several interminably long moments of silence, she heard him clear his throat.

"Chuck, whatever it is, just spit it out for God's sake." She sighed, feeling suddenly tired. "You know I'm not a particularly patient woman."

She felt cold fingers graze the back of her hand, and her eyes flew open in surprise. She turned to look at Chuck and saw that he was looking at her and wearing his half-smile. A lump rose in her throat when she noticed his left eye, a dark ugly bruise already framing it, looking so very wrong against his otherwise pale skin.

Fresh, sharp anger rose within her chest. Matt would _pay_ for doing this to Chuck. Oh, how she would make that creep pay.

He was squinting just a little because of his nearsightedness, and Angelica couldn't help noting how beautiful his brilliant green eyes were. They always had been, but they were more easily seen when he wasn't wearing his glasses. Those same eyes were perfectly inscrutable as he whispered, "You are the most amazing woman I have ever known."

For perhaps the first time in her life, Angelica found that she was completely speechless.

Meanwhile his eyes just kept staring into hers, and she felt that he was looking right through her. That should have made her feel uneasy, but instead it filled her with an odd sense of warmth. Without stopping to think, she reached forward and ran her fingers through his unruly red mane. He closed his eyes, and she pulled him towards her.

As she kissed him gently, mindful of his injuries, she found herself noticing that his lips were slightly chapped. A moment later, she realized she didn't mind. She felt Chuck reach up and cup her face in his hands. When she finally pulled away, breathing hard, she saw that his eyes were no longer inscrutable—they were filled with awe and longing. Angelica smiled and wondered, a bit uneasily, what her own eyes revealed.

Chuck opened his mouth to speak, but before he could get out a word, the door opened. The doctor who'd just stepped in looked from Chuck to Angelica to Chuck. He pursed his lips.

"Hi," said Chuck, blushing a little.

Angelica rolled her eyes.

Seeming a bit uncomfortable, the doctor cleared his throat. "Mr. Finster," he said, glancing down at his clipboard, "all your tests are in. You don't seem to have any brain trauma nor broken bones. Congratulations."

Angelica breathed out a silent sigh of relief. Next to her Chuck reached over and gave her hand a small squeeze.

The doctor, with still-pursed lips, looking for all the world like he'd just sucked on a lemon, continued, "You're free to leave whenever you're ready. Just drop by the nurses' station to sign some paperwork on your way out." The doctor headed back towards the door, turning back to add, in a tone of barely-repressed revulsion, "You might want to consider getting dressed again before you leave, by the way."

While Chuck's jaw dropped and he stammered in embarrassment, Angelica grinned. "He's right, you know. I'm afraid that paper gown doesn't work with your skin tone at _all_."

---

Author's Notes: This was perhaps my favorite chapter to write, for obvious reasons. But wait! There's still more to come! We haven't heard from Dil and Kim in a while, and what's up with Tom and Lil, huh? All this and more shall be revealed.


	20. The More Things Change

**Chapter 20: The More Things Change**

The stand-off in the hospital parking lot was tense. One would think that simply deciding who would drive home with who wouldn't result in a war. But if one thought that, one would be wrong.

Even in the dark, Lil could see the icy blue of Tom's eyes as he glared at his cousin. "I don't know," he said, drawing out the words slowly in a drawl filled with suspicion. "I think Chuck shouldn't be left alone at his apartment after a head injury."

Angelica rolled her eyes. "He's a big boy, and the doctors gave him a clean bill of health. He'll be _fine_, Tommy."

Tom's eyes moved over to Chuck and, if possible, narrowed even further. Chuck seemed to flinch a little but offered up a game smile. "It's okay, Tom. Really," he said.

"Then it's settled," said Lil, beginning to get a little annoyed. "Chuck drives back with Susie and Angie. Dil and Kim will swing by campus to drop off me, Tom, and Phil. And everyone lives happily ever after. The end."

Phil cleared his throat and got a shifty-eyed look that Lil didn't like in the least. Before he'd even said a word, his sister knew exactly what was coming. And no telepathic twin bond was necessary in the least.

"Actually, I was thinking I'd just ride back with Susie." Phil shrugged while shooting Lil an apologetic grin. "Since she was, uh, nice enough to drive me here and all."

Sometimes Lil hated being right all the damn time.

Ignoring Phil, she walked over to Chuck and gave him a hug, standing on tiptoe to place a light kiss on his cheek. "Call if you need anything?"

He nodded. "Of course."

Next Lil stopped over by Susie, leaning in close to whisper, "Don't even think of hurting him."

To Susie's credit, she didn't even flinch. "Wouldn't dream of it," she replied, also in sotto voice. "I know you'd totally put a twin curse on me or something."

Despite herself, Lil grinned a little, remembering how much she'd always liked Susie Carmichael. Maybe the whole Phil and Susie thing wouldn't be all too bad. Then she turned to the elder Pickles brother. "C'mon, Tom. Let's blow this popsicle stand. It's late, and I'm tired." Over her shoulder she called out, "G'night, Philly."

Kim gave Chuck a hug and kiss as well, while Dil stuck with a manly handshake, then together the quartet headed in the direction of Chaz Finster's van. Dil and Kim walked a few steps behind, and Tom occasionally glanced back at them over his shoulder. Finally he leaned over to Lil, and his warm breath sent a shiver through her. "I don't like my brother dating either," he whispered in her ear.

She too glanced back at the couple behind them, holding hands and laughing quietly, and she nodded. Tom understood her, and she understood Tom. At least _some_ things never changed. She whispered back, "I wonder what Chuck thinks."

Before Tom could reply, they'd reached the van. While Kim fished in her purse for the van keys, Dil leaned against the van's side and grinned. "You just know Phil's staying over at Susie's tonight," he said cheerfully.

Lil made a face, and Tom glared. "No way," Tom shot back. "Susie's got a roommate, remember? And not just any roommate. No way would Angie let Phil—" He trailed off suddenly. His brow furrowed, and he looked over worriedly at Susie's car, where the other four were piling in.

Lil couldn't figure out just what the furrow was about, but she was pretty sure it couldn't mean anything good. But then a smile came to her lips as she realized that if Dil, against all odds, was in fact correct in his prediction … that meant that Tom would have the room to himself tonight.

While Kim slid into the driver's seat, Tom got into the back of the van. Lil followed, given a helping hand by Dil, and just before ducking her head inside, Lil gave the younger Pickles brother a wink. She was rewarded when Dil's grin turning immediately into a look of confusion, one that was not entirely unlike Tom's.


	21. Imminent Death Deferred

**Chapter 21: Imminent Death Deferred**

Through the windshield of Susie Carmichael's car, Phil DeVille stared at the retreating backs of Chuck and Angelica. Chuck had insisted he felt fine, but Angelica, somewhat uncharacteristically, had insisted on accompanying him upstairs to get him settled in. It made sense, in a way. After all, Angelica probably felt a little guilty about Matt clocking Chuck, though for once it wasn't something that was entirely her fault. Even so, Phil sensed that something weird was going on.

Next to him, Susie threw the gearshift in reverse and began pulling out of the lot of Chuck's apartment complex. "So," she said suddenly, silkily, "would you like to come back to my place for a bit to hang out? Or would you like me to drop you off at your dorm?"

There was no question where he wanted to go. But that left the question of where he should go. "I'd love to hang out at your sorority house, Susie," he began, and glancing over, he saw her smile. "But I don't think I should."

Her smile immediately dropped away. "Why?"

"Um, because when Angelica comes back to your room, she'll kill me." He drummed his fingers on the armrest. Just thinking about Angie made him slightly nervous. Inexplicably, Susie's smile returned, and he laughed while asking, "What? Is my imminent death funny?"

"Phil."

"Yeah?"

"Angie isn't coming back home tonight." She paused, shooting him a brief, smug look. "You do know that, don't you?"

He hadn't known that, and he wondered how on earth she did. He thought it over. Surely Angelica wouldn't have to stay all night just to make sure Chuck was okay. Nor would she _want_ to. Clearly there was something he was still missing. In his most intimidating voice he threatened, "You better fess up to what you know, Carmichael, or I will be forced to tickle you to death."

Thoroughly non-intimidated, Susie laughed. She reached out, eyes still on the road, and brushed her fingers over Phil's forearm, sending a sudden heat rushing through him. "All you need to know," she told him, "is that I'm right."

Actually, that might not be a bad general policy, Phil realized.

Relaxing a little, Phil settled back into the plush leather car seats. "I'll take your word for it," he replied dryly. His fingers continued to drum against the armrest, this time thoughtfully instead of nervously. "It's too bad that Tom's plan for Chuck didn't get a chance to work."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," Susie said airily, wearing a mysterious expression, her dark brown eyes sparkling.

Phil just shook his head. He'd known Susie Carmichael almost his entire life, but he wasn't sure he'd ever fully understand her. Oh, well. Maybe later tonight, if he remembered, he'd ask her what she meant. But when Susie glanced over and shot him another smile, Phil forgot everything except how beautiful was this woman beside him, who seemed attracted to him for reasons unknown and unknowable.

---

Author's Notes: My apologies, again—I'm in the midst of exams (of the particularly evil law school variety) and just don't have much time to updates. But updates _will_ continue. And will become more frequent post-exams. (There's only about another four or five chapters, by the way.


	22. A Girl Like You

**Chapter 22: A Girl Like You**

"Mom, I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry."

While Dil Pickles continued apologizing profusely to his mother, Kim Finster nervously chewed on her lower lip. She stood near her father's van, kicking at loose bits of gravel in the driveway with the toe of her sneaker. This wasn't good, not at all. Getting Dil in trouble for being out past curfew was not an auspicious beginning for a romance.

Fortunately, Didi Pickles was a naturally forgiving woman, and when Dil mentioned that Chuck had gotten hurt, she immediately rushed over to Kim and enveloped the girl in a hug. "Oh, sweetie! Your poor brother!" Didi patted her hair. "You let Chuckie know that we're so sorry, okay?"

"Will do, Mrs. Pickles," Kim gasped out, ribs almost shattering from Didi Pickles' death grip.

"Well, then, I guess I'll leave you kids to say good-night." Didi released her hold on Kim and, on the way back to the house, gave her youngest son a similar affectionate-if-deadly squeeze. Just before she disappeared back into the Pickles' house, Didi turned and regarded them quizzically. With arched eyebrow she asked, "There wasn't any _drinking_ at this party, was there?"

"No, ma'am," replied Kim and Dil in perfect unison.

As soon as Didi was safely inside, Kim took a step towards Dil. He quickly closed the rest of the distance and, bending down, kissed her. She breathed in his scent—a little smoky from the frat house, a little sweet from the beer, a little bit naturally salty—and felt his warm arms wrap around her waist.

Kim frowned thoughtfully. This felt good. This felt right. But she couldn't help but wonder. "Dil?"

He grinned lazily. "Yup?"

"You don't think … " Kim bit her lower lip. "You don't think this all happened just because we're the only two left in town. Do you?"

Shaking his head, Dil pulled Kim a little closer. "No way," he declared. "Who else would have gone to that stupid party with me? Who else would put up with me coming by the Java Lava every freakin' day? Who else would make me laugh as much as you do?"

Kim looked away. To her embarrassment, she felt a slow blush begin creeping up her neck.

"You're special, Kim," Dil concluded, leaning down a little to look in Kim's eyes. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips. "And even if I went to all corners of the galaxy—which I totally intend to do someday, by the way—I could never find a girl quite like you."

With a grin Kim punched him lightly in the arm. "I bet you tell that to all the alien girls."

---

Author's Notes: Exams are over, so updates should be more often. Here's a last look at Dil and Kim—what cuties. Next up we have Tom and Lil, and I shall endeavor to make their last chapter a good one, as a peace offering to all the TL shippers out there.


	23. Noah's Ark

**Chapter 23: Noah's Ark**

"It's like Noah's ark," Tom Pickles complained, while shuffling towards his dormitory. "Everyone's pairing off."

With a rueful smile, Lillian DeVille intoned, "Let the rain begin."

Tom only grunted and kicked at a nearby beer can. The crushed can skipped down the sidewalk a few feet, loudly clanking the entire way. Tom watched morosely as the can fell into the gutter.

"Hey! Gilbert Grape!" Hearing Lil's voice, Tom glanced up. Lil had stopped walking and was standing, hands on hips. She continued, "What's eating _you_?"

He shrugged. "Nothing."

Lil cocked an eyebrow. _Liar,_ said the eyebrow.

He sighed and turned away. He hated how Lil knew him so well. It could be very … inconvenient. Running a hand through his hair, Tom stared ahead at where his dorm loomed large and foreboding against the night sky. He knew he was coming home to an empty room, and worse, he knew it was all his own fault.

"I didn't know that Phil had left the party," Tom said aloud. "I didn't know that Dil was pissed at me. And I didn't even know that Chuck was in trouble until it was too late."

From behind, Lil said nothing. Then, very softly, she offered, "For what it's worth, I didn't know that Phil had left either."

Tom nodded but didn't otherwise respond. After a few moments, he heard Lil sigh heavily. He turned around to find her standing only inches away. She lifted one well-manicured hand and poked him square in the chest.

"Stop being a doink," she said, poking him again for emphasis. "This self-pity party is so _not_ Thomas Pickles."

For a moment Tom's jaw worked but no words came out. The thing was, Lil had a point. Just as he realized this, Lil leaned forward and briefly brushed her lips against his, stunning Tom back to slack-jawed speechlessness. Meanwhile, Lil raised an eyebrow again, but whether in challenge or triumph, Tom couldn't tell.

Seeing that eyebrow—that damned, all-knowing eyebrow—was the last straw. Tom felt a smirk involuntarily play across his lips. "So," he said, in the smooth lady-killer voice he'd lovingly cultivated, "if a self-pity party isn't me, what is?"

Lil's eyebrow remained perched precariously near her hairline. "You don't even want to know," she replied coolly.

"Try me."

"For starters?"

Tom nodded. "An excellent place to begin."

"For starters," Lil repeated, tapping her chin thoughtfully, "you're way too cocky."

Laughing lightly, Tom took a step forward, so close that he could almost taste Lil's breath. He smiled as he said, "That's good, for a start. Anything else to add?"

"Yes. You're also obtuse." Lil smiled back. "Are you going to invite me up to your dorm room already or _what_?"

---

Author's Notes: I'm so sorry for the delay in posting this. Holidays and family together time and what-not. Also, I've found Tommy and Lil to be hard characters to write for, and I wanted to do them some justice. In penance, I shall post the next chapter right along with this one.


	24. Respect the Stilettos

**Chapter 24: Respect the Stilettos**

Chuck Finster's fingers gripped the set of keys in his pants' pocket. Though he couldn't see his knuckles, he felt reasonably sure that they were white, given how tightly he was clutching his keys. And though he stared straight ahead at the door of his apartment, with its chipped brown paint and broken knocker, he could feel the eyes of Angelica Pickles boring into him. There was a time, years ago, when such rapt attention from Angelica would have filled him with stark terror. Now, he still felt nervous. But he also felt … exhilaration.

"Welcome home," said Angelica.

Chuck's hand started trembling, which caused the keys to jangle softly. This was it. This was good-night, good-bye, good luck and farewell. Surely what had happened in the hospital was a fluke, and now they would part ways and go back to how things were. "Thanks," he said, sounding oddly calm to his own ears. "For everything."

Suddenly her hand gripped his wrist, and Chuck glanced over. "Your keys were driving me nuts," she muttered by way of explanation, her eyes not meeting his.

"Oh. Sorry."

Angelica let go of his wrist, to Chuck's disappointment. "I guess I better get going, since you look like you're doing pretty well," she said. "Shouldn't be a long cab ride. Might ruin Susie's little romantic evening with Philly, but _c'est la vie, non_?"

With that Angelica turned away. She began down the stairs, her long blonde hair shining under the hallway lights. Chuck watched mutely as she walked away, racking his brain for something—anything—to make her stay. It was now or never time.

"Wait."

She paused and looked up at him. Her blue eyes were deep enough that a man could drown in them. He couldn't tell whether she looked annoyed or merely expectant.

Licking his dry lips, he took a deep breath before continuing. He had to say the right thing. "You never had time to get a new pack of cigarettes," he pointed out, almost immediately concluding that this was not the right thing to say when she cocked an eyebrow at him. But he pressed bravely onward. "Would you like to come in for a cigarette? One for the road, so to speak?"

"Smokers' code?" There was a hint of mockery in her voice.

"Yes. Smokers' code."

She shrugged and began heading back up the stairs. "Sure. Why not?"

Turning around to hide his smile, Chuck took out his keys and quickly unlocked his apartment door. He pulled out his lighter and cigarette pack, leading Angelica out to his balcony where there were a couple of plastic lawn chairs. They sat smoking in silence for a few minutes, watching the curls of smoke drift upward and disappear into the dark night sky.

Angelica was the first to speak. "I guess I should start by apologizing. For all that crap when we were kids. Being so mean and selfish." She sighed, rolling her cigarette back and forth between her thumb and index finger. "I know I was part of all that standard rich kid bullshit. Feeling ignored by my overworking parents, therefore overcompensating with egotism. Guilty parents overcompensating by lavishing me with material possessions, therefore spoiling me. Blah, blah, blah."

Chuck nodded, saying, "Yeah. That sounds about right."

For a second Angelica glared at him before chuckling wryly. Then she flicked her cigarette over the balcony edge and turned to him. "Chuck," she said in a quiet voice, "what made you say that I'm amazing?"

Chuck blinked in surprise as he flicked his own butt over the balcony. "Huh?"

"Back in the hospital you said, and I quote, that I was the most amazing woman you had ever known. So why'd you say that? Just trying to get in my pants?"

"Of course not!"

She raised an eyebrow. "So you don't want in my pants? I'm not good-looking enough for you?"

Chuck blushed furiously.

The problem with Angelica Pickles—well, one of the problems—was that he could never tell when she was being serious and when she wasn't. He decided it was best to assume she was being serious. "I said what I said," he replied, "because it's true."

Angelica snorted.

"You _are_ amazing," he asserted, smiling a little. "Taking down a guy almost twice your size, while wearing high heels? If that's not amazing, I don't know what is."

She mulled that over for a few moments. "Stilettos," she said finally.

"Pardon?"

"They aren't just high heels, they're _stilettos_." A slow playful smile spread across her face.

So she wasn't serious. Oh, thank goodness. Chuck leaned forward, his chair creaking a little at his shifting weight. "My apologies for the mistake," he said, with just a touch of laughter in his voice. "Tell me, Angie, how can I make it up to you?"

Her smile turned seductive. "Oh, don't worry. I'll think of something," she murmured, right before grabbing a handful of his shirt and pulling him into a long, deep kiss.

---

Author's Notes: Here's another chapter, and a Chuck/Angie chapter to boot, as an apology for my tardiness. Only one more chapter to go, then this story's over! Whew. Thanks for reading!


	25. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

Critically studying her reflection, Angelica stared into the bathroom mirror and carefully applied a particularly flattering shade of lipstick. She wanted to look good for tonight. Tonight was important.

The sound of knocking shook her concentration, and she cut her eyes angrily to the door. "What do you want?" she yelled.

From the other side came Susie's exasperated voice: "I want you to get your ass moving! It's time to go, girlfriend!"

Sighing, Angelica put away her lipstick and exited the bathroom. Susie stood there with arms crossed over her chest but chose not to further harangue her friend. Instead, she simply handed the other girl a gun, and together they made their way downstairs. They shouted a quick good-bye to their other sorority sisters before dashing out the door, down to where Chaz Finster's beaten-up old van waited in the driveway.

As they slid into the rear seats, Kim turned around to shoot them both an annoyed look but said nothing. Beside her, in the passenger seat, Lil merely sniffed, "It's about damn time."

Angelica glared at the back of Lillian's head. "Now look here," she said testily. "Do you think I just wake up looking this gorgeous? It may astound you, but the answer is no. No, I do not." She waved a hand for emphasis, concluding, "Beauty is an _art_."

Just as Lil opened her mouth to respond, Kim cut her off. "Knock it off," she barked, turning the ignition. She glanced back at Angelica. "And that means everyone."

The van's ancient engine roared to life, momentarily cutting off all conversation. After the initial roar died down to a loud rumble, Lil muttered, "You're only taking _her_ side because she's dating your brother."

"I am so totally not taking her side, Lillian." Kim made a face. "And for the record, if anything, her dating my brother would only lead me to actively side against her. Also, there's the fact that she's evil."

Angrily Angelica leaned forward. "Now, wait a minute—"

Susie yanked Angelica back. "Calm down. And don't forget the mission." She gestured to the gun that lay in her lap. "This is for Chuck, remember?"

"Oh, all right. For Chuck." Angelica leaned back with a heavy sigh.

Craning forward to look at the two front seat passenger, Susie prompted, "Kim? Lil?"

Two more sighs followed.

"For Chuck."

"For Chuckie."

The rest of the van ride passed without incidence. Up front Lil fiddled with the radio, scanning through the available stations, while Kim drove. She eventually landed on a station that was playing an old Blondie song.

Angelica burst out laughing, while Susie cheerfully sang along, "One way or another, I'm gonna get ya ... I'm gonna get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya … "

Up front, Lil grinned and observed, "How appropriate."

When they finally reached their destination and Kim cut the engine, the girls remained in the van for several long moments, not speaking. Then Lil turned to the van's other occupants and said, "So! How do I look?"

The two sorority sisters looked her over. French-braided hair? Check. Make-up? Check. Long red dress? Check. Matching red heels? Check. Utterly insincere yet flirtatious smile? Double-check.

"You look fantastic," said Susie with an approving grin.

"You look passable," said Angelica. But then again, she, Susie, and Kim were hardly better. They were clad all in black, black turtlenecks and black cargo pants. Not the most feminine attire, Angelica thought sourly, but at least black was a slimming color.

Meanwhile, after removing the keys and handing them to Lil, Kim reached for her own gun. "All right, team. Let's do this."

Lil stepped out of the van, dropped the keys into her purse, and began walking down the sidewalk towards the fraternity house. The other three took a side route, carefully keeping to the shadows. It just wouldn't do to be spotted while carrying their weapons.

Once she'd reached the door, Lil reached into her purse and pulled out a compact. She opened it and pretended to check her mascara, while using the mirror to make sure the other three were in position. When she saw Kim give the go-ahead signal, Lil put away the compact. She took a few breaths to calm her nerves. Then she lifted one perfectly manicured hand to knock on the door.

She didn't recognize the brother who answered, but regardless of that fact, he took the opportunity to stare her up and down. She forced a smile and asked through gritted teeth whether her date was ready. The ogling frat brother didn't even invite her in but left her standing on the front porch while he wandered off to fetch her date.

Ugh. At least Tom wasn't here to see any of this.

Then her date arrived, looking rather dashing in a well-tailored charcoal gray suit with crisp white shirt and blue silk tie. Lil found herself reluctantly admitting that Angelica had been right—Matt _was_ awfully good-looking, at least from a distance. But up close, like he now was, ickily taking her hand and kissing it like he was some European noble instead of a creepy college guy, there was something distinctly off about him. While Angelica had complained about his soulless smile, Lil thought that it might actually be his eyes that bothered her the most. They seemed cold. Hollow, like a bullet.

She let him slip her arm through his as they left the porch. Carefully she counted their steps down the walkway. One. Two. Three. Four, and—with a sudden jerk, Lil pulled away and dove for some nearby bushes. As she scrambled to get away, the three gunners popped out from behind the yard's trees and began opened fire. Matt stumbled backwards, his white shirt suddenly dripping red.

After the gunners were out of ammo, they hightailed it to the van. Lil was already there, sitting in the driver's seat and revving the engine. They threw their guns into the back then scrambled in. With a squeal, Lil pulled out and floored it.

Back at the fraternity house, Matt stood in shock. What the—who were those girls with the guns? Where had his date gone? And what was all over his shirt? He wiped a finger across the dark red liquid, already soaking in, and sniffed at it. Then he frowned. Shaking his head in confusion, he trooped back up to the porch and let himself back inside the house. One of his brothers looked up, did a double-take, and asked, "What happened to you?"

"You don't wanna know," Matt growled, heading up the stairs.

Across campus at the sorority house that was currently doubling as a covert base of operations, the four girls sat in an old beat-up van, exhilarated at their triumph. They traded congratulations in between peals of uncontrollable laughter.

"Serves the bastard right," gasped out Kim, a steely tone underlying her laughter.

"Absolutely."

"He could've broken Chuck's nose! Or worse!"

Susie grimaced. "Not to mention what he tried to pull with Angie. Ugh. How gross."

Angelica shot Lil a grin. "I gotta admit," she said, "you did good, DeVille."

Lil pretended to fluff her hair and preen. Then she grinned too. "No, no, Angelica. Credit where credit's due. You are, after all, the one who thought up what to use weapons-wise."

Even Kim nodded at that, shooting Angelica a look of grudging admiration.

With a satisfied smile, Angelica sat back in her seat. She suddenly wished that someone had thought to bring a camera, but perhaps that was for the best. After all, if any of their boyfriends found out, they would almost certainly disapprove. But the look on Matt's face had been priceless and deserving of immortalization on film. A shame they wouldn't have any photos.

"Red wine was a perfect choice of ammo," Susie reflected, affectionately patting the water gun on the seat beside her.

Angelica chuckled. "Vengeance is ours. Because good old Matt? Will never, _ever_ get red wine stains out of that shirt."

---

Author's Notes: Last chapter! Thank you so much to everyone who's made it this far, and a special thanks to those who've taken a moment or two to review. I hope you've enjoyed the story. I tried to do the Rugrats/AGU gang some justice.

For those interested, I have another C/A story in the works. It's a bit more serious and darker in tone and entitled "Anatomy of a Hangover."


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